APPLE UNVEILS NEW iPHONE APP TO FIGHT BIG OIL

The Blaze

Want to destroy the eeeeevil “Big & Powerful” (initials BP) Corporation whose “nasty pollution” is destroying the planet? There’s an app for that — it’s called Blobster.

Apple’s latest game app allows users to clean up after and defeat “Blobzilla,“ the ”sloppy“ and ”very, very greedy” corporate boss of B&P who doesn’t understand the “natural beauty of Blobtopia.” Gizmodo has the scoop:

The fact that Blopster (sic) is some sort of blobule expert sort of makes things a big confusing in the analogy department, especially considering that he gets super powers from radioactivity. The game’s end goal is to somehow force B&P into bankruptcy by collecting these blobules.

But what about Bloptopia’s over-reliance on blobules? What will they do to replace B&P once it goes under? Is this going to lead to some sort of global economic meltdown or war on Blobtopia’s foreign interests still rich in blobules?

Maybe I should just get back to slinging blobs across the screen and lead the Bloptopian policy making to its Blobzillas.

Blobster App

ESR Image

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